Pro wrestler Zack Ryder wrote a song. Drop everything and listen to it. - Reverb

Pro wrestler Zack Ryder wrote a song called “Hoeski.” Drop everything and listen to it.

Pro Wrestler Zack Ryder has written a terrible, terrible song called "Hoeski." Screenshot from the song's music video.

Pro Wrestler Zack Ryder has written a terrible, terrible song called “Hoeski.” Screenshot from the song’s music video.

Pro wrestler Matt Cardona, better known by his ring name Zack Ryder, has penned the greatest disaster since Rebecca Black’s “Friday.” While his song “Hoeski” doesn’t have her 45 million plus views, it’s definitely painful enough to become the next viral video sensation.

The 27-year-old is the current WWE Internet Champion … Internet Champion? … and known as the “Woo Woo Woo Kid.”

The music video, complete with a romantic beach, dinner with beer, and up-the-crotch elevator camera shots, showcases such lines as “You say you moved on and found a new broski, but I don’t want you back girl because you are a hoeski” and “I thought we’d be soulmates like Bud Lite and lime.”

Ryder was all atwitter, literally, with news of his big musical break, Tweeting on Wednesday, “Tomorrow…the world as we know it changes forever. Tomorrow…the world premier of the ‘Hoeski’ music video. #WWWYKI”.

Wishing you could have those four minutes of your life back? Take solace in the fact that he also Tweeted that “Hoeski” was recorded in someone’s basement.

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Kelsey Fowler is currently studying nothing music-related at Ithaca College. Help keep her in the loop on Twitter.

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